| Monday, April 20, 2009
Party girl Okay, Last friday was a Cathy's Sweet Seventeen at Horison Hotel 2nd floor and let's the party begins.. I just arrived at there at 7 pm exact and guess what? only 4 persons just come there are Me, Merry, Abhi and Cindra ( i thought it's gonna be a lil bit late ya) but the place was pretty good i thought, and the theme of the party is 'Vintage' haha yaa a lil bit hard to adapt it but never mind, its one of great theme i thought hehe. And the party began with sang a song together, and we had a specia dinner.. umm i took a lot of foods there cause i was reaally starving haha and next we had some games, and it's really fun my friends are gone so freakin crazy there haha ;)after that we had the peak of the party.. yes we dance together at the dance floor! haha i know i am not really good in dance, but some of my freinds are crazy about it! Fhay is a good dancer-clubber, haha she's reaaly nuts in dance so she got the prize haha ;D and what about the guy? yes the boys are nuts too! Sam danced with aaa yeeaaa such a funny dance like a robots! haha i bet he got the prize too! next, Abhi wth his own style he's danced like an.. aaa i don't know it's really crazy and gue itu lucu banget pokokya hahah next we had Ikhy and Deborah who danced really well. And one word i might say- FRIENDS YOU ARE SO RRAAAWWKK! haha and the end of the party Cathy made a wishlist, and we ate the cake together. oyaa... the best dress had given to "Michelle" she's looked so Vintage and beautiful with that dress ;)and the other is "Abhi" he wore a nice cloth too with scarf and vedora, emm you look so stylish boy, haha =) Well, i got home at 11 pm and i thought it was a hillarious party and thanks for Cathy for the party ;)) xxx smoochiess Later, vyra 12:53 AM
Sunday, April 19, 2009
How I Realised How Much I Changed. If you noticed, (as I just did) all the things I thought about showed me the very stages of life I changed by. How? by the word How. How blatant I am. How stubborn I am. How forgetful I am. How childish I am. How cruel I can be. How Bitchy I can be. how scared I can be. How thoughtful I can be. How nice I can be. How I love everything that gives me some bitter-sweet past memories. How I hold on to these memories. How I cherish them. How I learnt to be self-reliant. Independent. How I took the world so seriously. How I love puzzles. How inquisitive my mind is. How secretive I am. How I keep mostly to myself. How emo I was. How happy I am now. How I found my light. How I hardly studied. How I learnt not to trust anyone How I stopped having a best friend. How I distanced myself from many. How I became the solitary bird in a home flight How I come up with weird terms and acronyms for stuff and forget about them. How I never spoke my thoughts, and when someone else said the very same thing i thought about months ago, I was accused of being 'unoriginal'. How TV was never really a significant part of my life. How instead, the internet was. How much I owe everyone around me. How stupid I was (notice the past tense), how STUPID I AM, (fine, I agreed), How my friends changed me. How my family changed me. How I dared to be different. How I dared to challenge Change. How I conquered Change. How I CHANGED. How I realized, by DAYDREAMING and BLOGGING ABOUT THE DAYDREAM. I'm afraid what my thoughts would do next.. the THOUGHT of that gives me goosebumps. p/s : for my closest who realised that i am changing a lot, soory if i was a bad friends ytd but you all know that i love you more than you know and now I AM CHANGING INTO BETTER. I PROMISE 9:28 PM
I can do this. I've been staring at my phone a lot. I think I'm waiting for a message from you that isn't coming. I think I'm just hoping my phone will ring and it'll be you on the other end. Will that ease me up a bit? Perhaps... I love you, baby boo. 9:28 PM
I can do this. I've been staring at my phone a lot. I think I'm waiting for a message from you that isn't coming. I think I'm just hoping my phone will ring and it'll be you on the other end. Will that ease me up a bit? Perhaps... I love you, baby boo. 9:28 PM
self-o-phobic [ ] black people [x] the dark [x] staying single forever [ ] being a parent [x] being myself in front of others [ ] open spaces [ ] closed spaces [x ] heights [ ] dogs [ ] birds [x ] fish [ ] spiders [ ] flowers or other plants total so far: 5 [ ] being touched [ ] fire [ ] deep water [x] snakes [ ] silk [] the ocean [ ] failure [ ] success [x] thunder/lightning [x] frogs/toads [ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends dad [ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends mom [ ] rats [x ] jumping from high places [ ] snow total so far: 9 [ ] rain [ ] wind [x] crossing hanging bridges [x] death [ ] heaven [ ] being robbed/mugged [ ] falling [ ] clowns [x] large crowds of people [ ] men [ ] women (more of common women's traits) [ ] having great responsibilities [ ] doctors [x] tornadoes total so far: 13 [x] hurricanes [x] incurable diseases [ ] sharks [ ] Friday the 13th [x] ghosts [ ] poverty [ ] Halloween [ ] school [ ] trains [ ] odd numbers [ ] even numbers [ ] being alone - too bad, i love it ^^ [x] becoming blind [x] becoming deaf [ ] growing up, old total so far: 18 [x] creepy noises in the night [x] not accomplishing my dreams/goals [ ] needles [ ] blood total: 20 “I'm afraid of 20 out of 72 common fears." But i shall add another: ] I am afraid of myself more than anything in this world ;S 9:03 PM
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
The Truth always Hurt "Cheer up . Life has never been fair so deal with it" It took only one person to say those particular words to make me realize and open my eyes.Have I been too unconversant with my own problems?That all I contrive is to just complain of all the things that aggravates me ? Am i not cognizant enough that maybe,maybe some things happen for a distinct reason? To be veracious , I can never deal with the my predicament .I tend to carp about it, but thats just it,isn't it.I'm just too oblivious that we have this problems so that we will work hard enough to prevail . But do I even have the strength ? 7:25 PM
Friday, April 10, 2009
me i realised i have changed alot and i am happy with how i am now. alot, oh i mean ALOT of people still think im the silly Vyra and bla blah. dude, is it so hard to believe that i have changed? people make mistakes and i do too. i still screw up here and there, im nowhere near perfect, and you're not too. all i used to care were parties, events and oh i dont blame anyone that labelled me as over socialize teenager. go ahead, i know how i was. i was once a person that even words can never describe, i was a horrible person, and i am not proud of it. but i changed, i manage to change. hayley williams is wrong, i am wrong when i quote her words ; "second chances don't even matter, people never change" i changed, its just a matter of how bad you want it. if you're strong enough to say no. i am thankful for every single thing i have now, i have my ups and downs, but this time, im not running away. i won't be crying my life out, i won't be asking people for sympathy, i won't. and for those who wants to change, dont just write it in you blog that you're tired of your screwed up life, do something about it. to those who never belived in me, well im sorry for you. sorry that all you see is the worst in people, im sorry that you see the glass half empty, not half full. to my friends,my bf specially who were there during the toughest moment in 2008, you people do not know much i love you :] <3 6:44 AM
writting for LOVE Every single day, im being all these, doing all these, looking forward to all these as nothing can ever make me more happier than TRUE LOVE. Being able to tell everything, being able to cry and get advices, being able to feel what its like to be appreciated and cared. I could only wish that what im feeling and having wont stop till the end of time. Im not pretending, are you? So, now in this blog i say and anyone who reads this is my witness. Im giving my commitment, my full capacity, my 100percent potential, my life, my future and my heart to the person i love most, the person i would risk everything for, my most precious possesion, for you brought me where i am now, away from everything thats ruining me, you changed me for the better, but most of all, you gave me love and theres no one could ever match up to your love for my heart belongs to you,(i hope you read this blog,dear) are you believing in true love? for some reasons, i guess the answer is yes xoxo, vyra 5:36 AM
Bored Haa today is Friday, yaa hari ini tadinya sih mama ngajakin ke moi, mau ntn Monster vs Alien, but.. because something so so stupid happened, yaa gajadi dehh hhaaaah waht a pity -___- yaudah tadi pagi gue bangun jam 9, hooh last nite i could'nt sleep and i woke up at 3 am cause my phone is rang 5 times hehehe my old lovely friend, Titi called me! WHAT A SURPRISE, I REALLY REALLY MISS HER since i met her about a half year ago.. huhu she asked me and Dato to go out, but she can't cause she have to go to KL again -___- im gonna miss you a lot dear, also miss my "3 Stooges" haha. That's so unforgettable moment in my whole life. I LOVE YOU, ALI DATO MADILAO, BAIQ FARISHA DESTIANA, SEKAR YULIN WULANDARI, RAYHAN ARKINSHA, oohh i really reeally want to turn back the time, di masa masa SMP dulu,ooooohh yea i wish i could god ;'( emm.. im blogging and online in this whole day, i just can't away from my laptop, hehe ;) fyi, i miss you bub, im soo soory if i hurt you nowadays, im currently filled with emotion and anger, but you know what i always love you no atter what, so i always keep my promises for you, just for you ;) but please don't hurt me no more, cause i don't want to being hurt again. I promise i am trying hard to be a better girl just for you ;) na-ah, i think im starving, i should find dome foods to eat, ciao 1:33 AM
Adapting, you have my words Baby you're the only reason I'm still standing, the only reason I haven't broke and shattered. The only reason for me to wake up to survive another Thursday night, another Friday morning. I love you, I love you, I love you.. It's been so long since I've said it. love you never end, baby ;) 1:00 AM
***** What the heck is going on with you, crap? why you always so uninvited to come and bother my life?AGAIN? huuuh i wish i could scream and shout to your ugly fuckin face, i tell you! so go away and FIND THE PLACE TO HIDE YOUR FACE! i'm so obviously hate you again.. later, 12:40 AM
Okay, so I've finished reading almost everyone's blog. Almost because some of them, I didn't read full heartedly.Anyways, it sucks going to boarding school when you read everyone's blog and realize they're all having fun. And realize what you're missing on. It's not easy to leave. To a place where no faces are familiar. Where every move you make is being watch because you're new. Where when you stare and everyone's little gesture and don't recognize them as you did back in your school. Where you can't fit in their conversations because that's not that usually talk about. Where sometimes, for a second, your hope dies because you just want to laugh with your classmates. It's not fair. Life's not fair. For goodness sakes, I don't even feel like I fit in on my own MySpace. WHATHEFUCK?! And it's only been a week plus. Ya Allah, give me emotion, mental and physical strenght -- the only thing I asked for again and again everyday now for the past week. Sacrifices are made for reasons. And at the end of the day, they're worth it. But I'm not even halfway to the end yet. How do I get through this? xo 12:10 AM
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Getting on my nerves I can't keep up. Do you know how that feels?! Like half of you wants things just to be normal again so badly, and the other half just want to escape and start on a fresh, new page. To be in a place you can be anyone you want to. Looks like I won't be turning into an optimist anytime soon :| [Don't try to understand] [And you wouldn't know who is who, seriously; so don't bother!] Everybody has a problem with everybody, right? I have a problem with him And her Not to mention, them THEM. Oh god, them Does she know how much I miss her? Did he know I missed him? Does she realize all the things I wish I could say to her... could make tears fall down my cheeks. Does he realize that everyday I make a speech on what to say to him if I ever see him one of these days? I just, at one moment, seem so attached with certain people and for a space to be created in between us is something I'm never going to get used too. Resulted by my own naive self -- might I add. Do you know how THAT feels like? Like seeing such a familiar face almost everyday, on a daily basis; like knowing a personality inside-out, knowing their darkest secrets; biggest dreams; and suddenly wake up to realize you don't even know the right words to say to them anymore... ): I am just so tired and it seems like I'm buried under a ton of fucked up shit that keeps on coming. To apply that perky personality in my daily life, and painting that smile on my face, that zany laugh... ain't that easy nowadays, I tell you. Caught up in life and constantly feeling a twinge of envy. Not to mention the high pitched singing, the zany and the tenacious part of me is slowly fading away. I guess I'm gonna keep on passing through my days, barefaced and blatant, perhaps. Good day. p/s: did you know how much i miss you dear? didn't you know that? 10:37 PM
Like slow spinning redemption I wonder, wonder if I'd ever see you for who you really are. Will I ever trust you again? I wonder, how you played with my thoughts; the feeling makes me sink to the bottom. And this is the part; this little part of my shattered heart, this feeling that lives under my skin, this part that I despise so much; screaming out. This is the part where the young girl of trauma fills my shoes. I wonder alot these days. I question every single action I do; I wonder how I ever did fall for you. What have I done, so terrible to you, that you would do this to me? I know I may not treat you right. I know my behaviour is unacceptable at times. I know I may not be perfect. But don't take me for a fool, I always see this coming. I take high precautions, I usually see the signs. Am I trying too hard? It was a matter of time before I woke up. Its no point choosing to not believe reality; you can't keep on living in dreams. I failed. I failed to see all along, you were playing games with my feelings, I failed to see all along, I had my own wings. Its like you were floating, while I was falling, and I didn't mind. I smiled at the view, you kept on rolling the dice. Still, slight hope dangles on a string, like slow spinning redemption. Hope still exists behind all the lies, that's the reason I'm willing to try; Your one last chance, sweetie. I wonder, I wonder alot these days. Most of all, I wonder how I bought all your lies.Won't you hurt me again, sweetheat? I guess the answer is NO. 9:31 PM
Friday, April 3, 2009
All i have- J.Lo Where was your last picture taken took place? emm at home maybe What are you currently thinking? it's not necessary ya Are you secretly afraid of heights? definitely yes When will you get cranky? when someone interrupt me when im doing things i lovee the most What did you last drank? peel fresh orange juice, yumm What are you hearing right now? ballads of the cliche, ben-michael jackson Who did you last saw? my bf <3 Why did you see him? cause i want How old is your Myspace already? (if you have one) two years already :) Who are you talking or chatting right now? bf, my aunty Any songs you're listening to? pure saturday-spoken Write one lyric by Paramore How do we get here, I used to know you so well - Decode Are you good at lying? Not really, How could you be so heartless? am i ? i think im mean but not heartless aha Are you close to your family? na-ah, not really Do you live with them? yes Who do you know are leaving somewhere else? hmm It's funny when I think back the way you mistreated me- 6:58 AM
Happy Birthady to you, happy birthay to you, happy birthday happy birthday, haapy birthday to youuuuuuuuuuu HAPPY SWEET 17, MY LOVELY FRIENDS, MAYA RIKA FITRIANA ;)) p/s: we will go to jogya soon, don't worry honeey ;) 2:30 AM
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Wait for this!  aaa kemarin gue ke mayestik dan om gue bilang disana ada lomo yang gue cari sampai detik ini, lomo holga kit CMY edition! aaaa i can't wait to buy it! -_____- later, vyrawr 3:03 AM
hihi Yaa tadi siang pas mau makan siang, Meita buka blog ini sambil ketawa tawa, and i was curious..so i picked this one blog, dan isinya lucu-lucu hihi so here is one of them : Yang penting long...
Posted by: ngupingjakarta 2:53 AM
Future Hell.o! okay so ive been thinking about my future. what i am going to do in life and stuff. i realised that your career actually reflects your child/children. so here are some careers and what it may do to your kids. hihi fashion designer positive : your child may be the coolest person in school negative : you discover that your son is gay and your daughter is the biggest slut ever teacher positive : people will hog your child as if they're the last pair of oxfords left! no, he/she is not popular, they just want to kiss your ass :] negative : nobody wants to be friends with your child becaus he/she tells EVERYTHING to you actor/actress/singer/entertainer on tv positive : everybody keeps on telling how great you are to your children, which may lead to him/her having alot of friends negative : realised how sucky you really are, everybody immediately dumps your child psychiatrist positive : people will ask your child for advice negative : your child turns into a psycho maniac after listening to you giving her bull advices every single day :O hihi, so which one you choose then? dont take this seriously, i was just bored :O ♥♥♥ 2:27 AM
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Finally! I am so happy nowadays.....CAUSE : I HAD PASSED THE PRESENTATION! hahah no matter the result lah, the thing is i have done my presentation today ;) Thanks for your spririt, i know you always light me up! xo ;)) and the end Mr. Paul gave us the funny quiz hihi okay im so lazy to write this blog, Later then, xo 2:10 AM
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Hello Im Vyrawr! I'm one of those pessimistic optimists or maybe vice versa. Zaniness and melancholy have dominated my life in many ways. I can say that I'm pretty content but on certain occasions a dark cloud will form above my head. I sleep late,I eat in bed and I like colourful objects.Arts have always been a part of me for as long as I can remember. I'm open minded,spontaneous and I procrastinate. I go ballistic when I see anything old-fashion or just passing by a camera store. you@hotmail.com bold italics underline Goals Exits link Talk Tagboard here. Archives February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 Credits Designer Blogskins |
